I'm hoping for an intersexed child, you?
August 5th 2008 15:08
Category: No Category
Someone asked me if I would prefer a boy or a girl as the gender of a hypothetical child, and at first I thought I would prefer a girl, but now I'm realising that intersexed people are the way to go.
Why?
1. Because they can get away with being feminine and masculine, sometimes at the same time.
2. Because they could, according to their dress and demeanour, gain access to both female-only and male-only environments, thereby creating a culture all of their own. I like being a female, but it would be nice to be permitted into male-only 'clubs', whatever this may involve.
3. Because it gives them the perfect premise for challenging stereotypes about gender, and would encourage them to think outside the box.
If you would like more information about intersexuality, here's the Wikipedia page on the topic.
Why?
1. Because they can get away with being feminine and masculine, sometimes at the same time.
2. Because they could, according to their dress and demeanour, gain access to both female-only and male-only environments, thereby creating a culture all of their own. I like being a female, but it would be nice to be permitted into male-only 'clubs', whatever this may involve.
3. Because it gives them the perfect premise for challenging stereotypes about gender, and would encourage them to think outside the box.
If you would like more information about intersexuality, here's the Wikipedia page on the topic.
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Comment by katyzzz
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Would you be a democrats supporter by any chance?
Just wondering.
Comment by Jayne Kearney
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I've just started reading Middlesex by Jeffrey Eugenides (author of The Virgin Suicides). The opening line reads:
"I was born twice:first as a baby girl, on a remarkably smogless Detroit day in January of 1960, and then again, as a teenage boy, in an emergency room near Petoskey, Michigan, in August of 1974."
I am only a little way into it (it has some incredible historical detail as the author explores the protagonist's Greek heritage). So I can't really tell you what the ultimate conclusion/theme/message may be. You might like to check it out.
I do think, though, that an intersexed child would probably have to deal with a lot of challenges - either physical or psychological. They would have to be an extraordinary person to challenge gender stereotypes when really, most kids just want to be like other kids. In an ideal world intersexuality might offer the advantages you list here but, we're not really in that world yet, are we??
Jayne
Comment by postmoderncritic
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It's precisely because I hope it comes true that I wish for it.
Yep, proud Democrat supporter - pity I can't vote in November.
Hey Jayne -
I'm aware that people who don't seem to fit into those rigid gender binaries so many people seem to favour often do have a hard time, but I'm sure that with my parenting, and a handful of good friends, my hypothetical kid would grow up happy, balanced and an innovative thinker ahead of their time.
The advantages I listed are responses to my current world, I strongly believe that a person who is gender-fluid could have a wonderful life even today, and I know that I would challenge a lot of my own pre-conceptions by following their development, which would be great.
I never wanted to be like other kids, and I can't imagine a child of mine wanting to do so... They're going to be brought up to value individuality and nonconformism from Day 1.
Thanks for the recommendation, I'll put it on my book list.
Comment by RubySoho
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It's like the children of immigrants. In Australia we are "wogs". But go back to the old country for a visit and we are 'australianos".
Its not easy being different.
Comment by Jayne Kearney
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I applaud and support your thoughts. Encouraging non-conformity to those things we don't enjoy about our world is a way for our race to evolve. It's why I encourage inclusive behaviour in my kids against the tide of prejudice which is a type of conformity, in this country particularly. Your kids will benefit from your willingness to support individual thought and behaviour.
And as soon as I wrote that 'kids just want to be like other kids' I thought to myself, "But I bet Epiphanie didn't!"
I also didn't want to be like other kids in many ways - I valued the fact that my brain worked differently and that I wasn't able to conform to a lot of things. At the same time I hated standing out because of other things which made me different - I was from a divorced family and we were the 'poor' kids. In my day that was hard. Sometimes it is hard being different.
But you are right, with love and support kids are much better equipped to sally forth and tackle the world on their own terms.
Just beware, a teenager's instinct is to rebel. You know you will end up giving birth to a vanilla-flavoured accountant!
lol (and apologies to all accountants!)
Jayne
Comment by AmyHuang
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Comment by postmoderncritic
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I was thinking that an androgynous-looking and gender-neutrally attired person could fit into both environments if they so chose, it might be more difficult if the members of these environments knew them to interact with other same-sex environments of the 'opposite' gender. However, I know that Women's Spaces at unis, for example are for 'female-identifying' students, so who's to tell my hypothetical kid that they can't identify as 'female' for the afternoon? Most groups like this in the West promote tolerance and respect for others, not exclusion.
No one has called me a wog - ever. Of course, I grew up in the Eastern Suburbs of Sydney and went to selective primary and high schools.
The thing is, would you really want to be a part of a community that didn't accept people who were somehow different? I'd rather be included in a small sector of the community which was open-minded than be 'accepted' by people whose views I don't respect.
It's not easy to be different.
I disagree here. Everyone is different in some way. Everyone is the same in some way. Society is a muse which lends itself to creating a lot of patterns and trends, but the minute you think you have it worked out, everything changes. There are too many variables at stake, so everything is relative. So if we're all different, why not consciously seek to celebrate your difference? That's my idea with embracing intersexuality. I think it's important to keep challenging your worldview, questioning the norms and conventions, because gender is much more fluid than I realise, and intersexuality adds a welcome perspective on it all.