Some Thoughts On Coming Out Week
October 14th 2009 08:04
:
Celebrating You And Me, Us And We
Category: No Category
a) I have been out (first as gay, then as bisexual, and, for a long time now, as being disinterested in definitions - just being myself and loving people for their souls, not their sex or gender) for the last ten years or so, and I'm proud and happy that coming out in the world is becoming increasingly easier.
b) One of my role models in the popular media include British pop artist Mika, who recently revealed in an interview with the Dutch Gay Night Magazine: I mean, I've never ever labeled myself. But having said that; I've never limited my life, I've never limited who I sleep with. So, whatever. Even if I was going out with a man right now, I still wouldn't tell you. And I wouldn't tell anyone. I mean, I would tell you though, as my friend, but not as a journalist, you know what I mean? So, I don't know. Call me whatever you want. Call me bisexual, if you need a term for me.' He went on to say: You shouldn't have to say 'I'm gonna label myself in order to figure out what is going to make me happy in life'. Having a role model who makes you feel like it's alright to do whatever you want, without the pressure of a label, I think that's a good thing as well. I think there's a million different ways to do it, there isn't only one. And I hope I'm right. That's the key to it. You don't have to pigeonhole yourself all the time. You shouldn't stick yourself into any kind of constraints or limitations at all. And seriously, if 'bi' is the label that helps you do it, then do that, as I said already. Apply that to me, if that's what you want. That's as close as I'll get to any label.'
c) While I'm talking about people in the public eye, I would also like to say that I admire Lady GaGa coming out about her attraction to women so early in her career, and frequently championing the gay community. Her public vow to reject misogyny and homophobia at the LGBT National Equality March [Gay Rights Rally] in Washington D.C. is heartening and I support the personal commitment to a better self and a better world she is making.
d) Following on from that, this Coming Out Week is, for me, all about forgiveness. Forgiving one's self, my family, my friends, my acquaintances, people I have never met who influence me (and let's face it, every single person on this planet influences every other person), and even people who I don't like, or who don't like me. Forgiving more fully allows me to fall more fervently - in love.
e)
If you are only attracted to men, or only attracted to women, you are a small minority group.
If you are afraid of the fluidity of your sexual orientation, you are part of the majority.
If you open to your heart to a person, not to pre-defined gender-traditional performance or a streamlined sexual orientation, you are part of a growing group. Not too long from now, that group will be the vast majority. There is more to celebrate every day.
Turning inward allows me to turn outward too, eventually.
f) It was suggested by a Facebook user that the letter 'S' should be added to GLBTI - I like it! How about 'SBGLTI' - Strawberry Gelato? Though I think it may be more powerful to attach the S at the end of ITBLG, since 'straight' people are often the last to experience the liberation that comes with doing away with traditional sensibilities on gender and sexuality and performing their own postmodern approach.
g) The only cure for love is to love some more. - A quote I haven't been able to find the source of.
b) One of my role models in the popular media include British pop artist Mika, who recently revealed in an interview with the Dutch Gay Night Magazine: I mean, I've never ever labeled myself. But having said that; I've never limited my life, I've never limited who I sleep with. So, whatever. Even if I was going out with a man right now, I still wouldn't tell you. And I wouldn't tell anyone. I mean, I would tell you though, as my friend, but not as a journalist, you know what I mean? So, I don't know. Call me whatever you want. Call me bisexual, if you need a term for me.' He went on to say: You shouldn't have to say 'I'm gonna label myself in order to figure out what is going to make me happy in life'. Having a role model who makes you feel like it's alright to do whatever you want, without the pressure of a label, I think that's a good thing as well. I think there's a million different ways to do it, there isn't only one. And I hope I'm right. That's the key to it. You don't have to pigeonhole yourself all the time. You shouldn't stick yourself into any kind of constraints or limitations at all. And seriously, if 'bi' is the label that helps you do it, then do that, as I said already. Apply that to me, if that's what you want. That's as close as I'll get to any label.'
c) While I'm talking about people in the public eye, I would also like to say that I admire Lady GaGa coming out about her attraction to women so early in her career, and frequently championing the gay community. Her public vow to reject misogyny and homophobia at the LGBT National Equality March [Gay Rights Rally] in Washington D.C. is heartening and I support the personal commitment to a better self and a better world she is making.
d) Following on from that, this Coming Out Week is, for me, all about forgiveness. Forgiving one's self, my family, my friends, my acquaintances, people I have never met who influence me (and let's face it, every single person on this planet influences every other person), and even people who I don't like, or who don't like me. Forgiving more fully allows me to fall more fervently - in love.
e)
If you are only attracted to men, or only attracted to women, you are a small minority group.
If you are afraid of the fluidity of your sexual orientation, you are part of the majority.
If you open to your heart to a person, not to pre-defined gender-traditional performance or a streamlined sexual orientation, you are part of a growing group. Not too long from now, that group will be the vast majority. There is more to celebrate every day.
Turning inward allows me to turn outward too, eventually.
f) It was suggested by a Facebook user that the letter 'S' should be added to GLBTI - I like it! How about 'SBGLTI' - Strawberry Gelato? Though I think it may be more powerful to attach the S at the end of ITBLG, since 'straight' people are often the last to experience the liberation that comes with doing away with traditional sensibilities on gender and sexuality and performing their own postmodern approach.
g) The only cure for love is to love some more. - A quote I haven't been able to find the source of.
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Comment by Janet Collins
Acceptable Etiquette
The Social Critic
Janet Collins Blog
Do my beliefs make a difference? Maybe not?
Comment by Postmodern Critic
Postmodern Critic
Relativity Watch
Padsoc
And they no doubt have an impact on those around you as well - even if you don't talk about this subject with everyone, you impart a sense of your values everywhere you go, and I believe a lot of people are drawn to an attitude like yours, and in some cases without realising it.
Thanks for your comment.